March is Women’s History Month. So what?

I retired from a bank, not from life and still enjoy sharing information as it relates to business and/or professional women.

In that connection, I discovered some remarkable facts of particular interest and this is by no means a complete view of information garnered, just some highlights of my own personal interest.

·    Center for Women’s Business Research. Statistics for Houston in 2004 confirmed that “nearly half of all private held firms represent 50% or more women-owned. These 158,239 firms generate $50.2 billion in sales and employed 324,876 people.”

·    Compare that to current data found on www.businesswire.com : “Between 1997 and 2012, when the number of businesses in the United States increased by 37%, the number of women-owned firms increased by 54%, a rate 1.5 times the national average.” With regards to geographic trends, one of the states with the fastest growth in the number of women-owned firms during the past 15 years includes Texas at 75% growth.

·    Finally I found some interesting facts from The State of Women-Owned Business Report commissioned by American Express OPEN: “Averaging together the ten-year growth rankings in the number, revenue and employment of women-owned firms in the 25 largest metropolitan areas in the country-to look at combined economic clout –reveals …SanAntonio and Houston, TX at # 2 and #3.” The industry trend section reports that “Women-owned firms continue to diversify into all industries.”

This is both amazing and encouraging at the same time.  Consider how any professional membership fits into these numbers and also how each of us serves or is being served by these companies or contacts.  This confirms to me that there is more than enough business to go around for every one regardless of any self-defined niche.

There are countless articles about how women are more inclined to do business with other women. Additionally, women emphasize relationship building as well as gathering facts and may take more time to make decisions in her business.  The quality of a membership, mentoring group, and special interest group lends to that process from giving to receiving referrals and establishing relationships.

Many have heard me say that sometimes it is not who you know but who knows you, and the best way to be known is to get involved.  What are you doing to make a difference and make your communications work for you? 

Funerals can also be Inspiring

Funerals can be sad as we recall someone much loved who is no longer here with us.  However, they can also be uplifting as the one for my Aunt Dude (Julia Buck Francis) on Wednesday.  She lived a life of service and was also known, loved, and appreciated for her resourcefulness while raising her five children.

Her oldest child, Betty Ann Francis Zeamer, provided the eulogy which spoke volumes and touched every heart and tearful eye at the service.  She provided a perfect eye view into the life of her mother from young love, a mother, grandmother, great grandmother and her famous, enjoyed by all, biscuits.  My heart was heavy as I entered the chapel and was lightened by the love-filled words of remembrance for one so special and beloved.  Betty spoke of the dash between the birth date and departure date which I have heard about many times over the years from others. However, in the instance of my aunt, the way she lived “the dash” between her birth and date of death will be recalled by hundreds and only in favor.

She would be most proud to see how each of her children comforted each other during her transition to heaven and in the recent days that followed her departure.  What a joy to share our wonderful memories as children with our many cousins.  I could actually see the love of my aunt reflected and expressed in each of her now grown children whose ages range from 53 to 64, if memory serves.

I am equally proud of my mother who loves my cousins as her own children and looks forward to the many days left that we can all share together.  In the passing of her sister my mother also lost her best friend with whom she could share anything. Some sisters do have that type of relationship but not nearly enough.  

I got home tonight and the first thing I did was make biscuits.  Was I hungry? No. Was I remembering my Aunt Dude who shared a tip or two about making biscuits? Absolutely.  Were they as good as hers? No way but who can really duplicate perfection.

She may be leaving us but ……..

My mother called earlier today and is beside herself with anxiety and soon to be grief. Her sister, our beloved Aunt Dude (Julia Evelyn Francis) is transitioning into hospice care. She has been battling cancer for many years and now our final days with her are upon us.  She is and has been a faithful Christian Woman of God and has said many times over the last few months that she is tired and ready to go to her heavenly home. We are never ready to let go of those we love, even our family members who have been so dedicated to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ through words, actions and deed but have endured many years of cancer related treatments, pain and discomfort.

Growing up, many a summer my sisters and I had some of our most memorable moments with her at her kitchen table, playing outside on their multiple acre homestead out in the country which included what we thought was the most awesome swing ever made from an old feed sack tied with a rope attached to a big tree near the porch, and I will never forget the "singings" at their church and sister churches and the yearly ones at the Oak Grove decoration over Memorial Day weekend. We wanted to see her immediately after crossing the Arkansas state line but visited with our grandparents in town first.  In fact, my mom and dad would ALWAYS SAY “I’ll whip the first one of you kids that asks to go to Aunt Dude’s while we are visiting with your Grandma and Grandpa.”   We did not understand that Mom wanted to visit with her Mom and Dad first. We just knew that Aunt Dude was a short 30 minutes away (which seems like an eternity once you are finally in the car again).  Our cousins were actually our best friends when we were growing up.  We could not afford to talk on the phone often but we sure wrote letters on a regular basis.

I learned to cook by watching her every move in the kitchen and even churned butter which was a real treat for this city girl.  She made the best biscuits EVER and could whip out a meal for her brood and our family faster than most do now with all of the modern conveniences at our disposal. We could hardly wait to get to her house to shell peas or anything else from her garden that she “saved” especially for us.  She always remembered how much I loved her canned pickles and would save me a jar. Even last September she gave me a jar along with some squash relish that also has no equal on any shelf anywhere.

Her sweet spirit, beautiful voice in song, unlimited words of wisdom and support, contagious  laughter, her ability to tell a joke like no one else and her soft spoken heart-warming Arkansas drawl do not have a match here on earth. Her capacity for love and forgiveness seems limitless and she always had time for me and to talk with me. 

Her reward in heaven will be greater than our grief but for now it is hard to accept or acknowledge the fact that her days here with us are at a minimum. Praise God for the life she lead and praying for the comfort that only God can provide to those of us who remain.

I am not sure when we will leave for Arkansas for a visit while Aunt Dude is still aware of her surroundings. She is naturally heavily mediated to help with the pain.  My mom was crying so desperately and is not in a position to make any decisions at the moment. My mother is what one would call a worrier and her anxiety level is on overdrive, as one would imagine. I am equally concerned about my mom and her emotional well-being. She and Aunt Dude talk almost daily. My mom is 80 years and is also on the decline in a few areas.  This loss will take its toll on her as does the recent news that her youngest brother has cancer with the treatment as yet undetermined. 

Yes, this message is long but my heart is full and words keep spilling from my fingers.

Alas, Babylon by Pat Frank

Yes, it has finally happened.  Russia and our USA push “the” buttons which lead to the physical destruction of the majority of each country and surrounding areas.  Imagine life without electricity, telephone communication, gasoline for your cars, batteries, and inadequate water and food supplies.  Add this to the basic nature of man, that being survival and at whatever costs which will not be limited to robbery, theft, murder, violence at every level plus the effects of radiation and how to limit further exposure.  The crash of 1929 pales in comparison; there are no banks LITERALLY and cash has become meaningless. 

Imagine no President, Vice President, etc., key military and intelligence personnel,  and the responsibilities falling onto a cabinet member who just happened NOT to be Washington, DC, a major metropolis or military establishment that was bombed. Imagine no longer being a super power but more of a territory and even that cannot be confirmed by any degree at the moment. Imagine being in a somewhat remote area which has not been adversely affected by the H-bomb or direct fallout.  However, someone still needs to be in charge of making decisions and establishing order and making new laws from which to govern.

Yes, we won but at what cost? The recovery would be 1000 years in the making.

The countries today are no longer limited to Russia and USA but this book is absolutely relevant and is highly recommended.  Original copies of this book may be difficult to find and were not available on my NOOK but lessons plans and related study notes are available.  I borrowed a copy from my friend and fellow book group reader Mari Davis and will be returning it to her at BPW book group next month.  I can understand her reluctance to share this copy from 1959 but it would be worthwhile to find a copy for own personal enjoyment.

I enjoyed every page of this book and particularly the writing style.  Keeping in mind that it was written 1959, I was thrilled to miss the gutter talk, body stripping, and literal violence.  I know what is happening without those types of details.  Why clutter and pollute our minds with the unnecessary!

The Amish Bride by Mindy Starns Clark and Leslie Gould

Each of us can recall the time we thought we knew better than our parent(s) as to what and whom our future should include.  We placed our own interpretation on events and conversations but believed them to be the “only” truth or possibility. A young girl (Ella) is somewhat determined to force a future which includes plans to join a church primarily to marry a young man she has known most of her life.  She is a Mennonite and he is Amish.  Her goals include going to school to become a baker and has dreams of owning her own store but will becoming Amish be the beginning of the end those dreams? Circumstances create a distance between them from Pennsylvania to Indiana and they appear to be determined to be together.

This book speaks to a family and a history that does not become clearly understood and questions are left hanging for decades until a diary written in some kind of code by a great-grandmother can be deciphered. At the request of Ella’s grandmother, she takes the diary to discover its secrets.  What she learns in the process opens her hear to understand other things about herself, the questionable infant death of an unbeknownst uncle (her grandmother’s only son), and also her own mother which leads Ella to finally forgive her absentee father. 

Ella’s future changes, however, she does realize all of her goals in ways she did not see coming AT ALL. 

Being “Plain” does not mean being simple minded or boring. It does however include commitment to God, family unity, and being equally yoked.  Personally, I believe the same and I am neither Amish nor Mennonite.  Each religion has a written reference. For me it is the Bible so feel free to check out the love chapters, more commonly known as the Corinthians.

Dear Abby

People, young and old alike, lost someone precious today: the original Dear Abby. She had millions of followers and there may be some who may not realize that she took to task the shoddy advice column of the San Francisco Chronicle back in 1956.  This stay at home mom took ownership of the concerns expressed in the letters to that newspaper and how fortunate we are that the paper recognized her talents which resulted in the column that we know today.

Most of my dearest friends grew up reading Dear Abby and it may have been one of the first articles we read when opening our newspaper. Her twin sister we grew to love as Ann Landers.  Each used pseudonyms but in every other way they were the real deal in my opinion.

As a young woman and even today the articles are relevant and impart both common sense wisdom and words to the wise.  I realize that the “Abby” of long ago has morphed onto someone else and I am glad that current media has not chosen to forego the column.   I will enjoy it while it lasts.

By the way, “my” Dear Abby is conveniently located in the Houston Chronicle Star section which also includes the Jumble, Daily Crossword and Hints from Heloise which are also some of my personal favorites.  Even though retired, I like to keep my mind working on SOMETHING.  Life is good and may God bless the memory and be with the family of our beloved Dear Abby who in real life is known as Pauline Phillips.

Fresh Start and New Beginnings

January always brings to mind fresh starts and opportunities, new beginnings and moving past the disappointments from the previous year and attempting, where possible, to correct the whatever and lastly, but more importantly, to acknowledge or thank someone for something every single day.

When reviewing the news from last year, it served as a reminder of those who can no longer share their life with us in the present.  However, we can share in the joy of their accomplishments and what they have contributed to our lives in the form of family, food, fashion, fun, or being female. 

On a personal note, I was told by a beloved family member and much later actually read the same thing that the way you start the beginning of your year is the way you will spend the rest of that year. Hence, I begin my new year with family and friends and have for nearly 30-years.  My New Year’s Eve and the previous two days are spent feeding one of my passions … cooking.  On New Years Day I serve the same menu and make many, many pies to use as gifts. (This year I made 36 pies.)  As family and friends arrive, I request that each child followed by each family select a pie as my gift to them for deciding to begin their year with me, in my home. Any remaining pies will accompany our shared meal as the “grazing” period begins sometime around 1 p.m. Before retirement I rented a moonwalk which was setup in the backyard with easy viewing from a kitchen window and the back patio. One of the men might bring horse shoes or washers to setup near the moomwalk.  Yes, I choose to spend my New Years Day with people that I love, admire, and absolutely enjoy/relish/covet their company. 

How we spend our time and who we spend it with is a choice that I readily make each day and count each person as an added benefit/gift to my life.  We encounter enough that we cannot control both personally and professionally.  I freely admit to loving life and value each part of my life from the gene pool to zip codes. 

This is a new year, so enjoy your life, make an appointment with yourself to have fun, and exercise wisdom to make choices that create value to your life and the lives that you impact or encounter each day in 2013.  Share yourself.

To Remember in December

The fall season and early days of winter have always been my favorite time of year.  The wind carries the sounds of change away from those hot South Texas summer days and muggy evenings into the season of laughter, merriment and sincere appreciation of the Christmas season that I will share with family and special friends.

Did you know that Christmas Day has been celebrated on December 25^th by the Western (Roman Catholic) Church since 336 A.D.? Did you know that the exchanging of gifts and decorating trees are tied to winter traditions and various celebrations and festivals dating back over 4000 years? Did you know that the 12 Days of Christmas may tie back to a 12-day festival celebrated by the Mesopotamians and that hanging of garland dates back to the Ancient Romans in their celebration each year in honor of their god Saturn?

Our Jewish friends celebrate Hanukkah and Kwanzaa honors the heritage of African-Americans. December can be both a memorable and memory making month for all of us.

Yes, I have been reading again and am of the opinion that though our religious beliefs, values and traditions may greatly vary that at our core (our center) we are one and united in our right, our privilege, and freedom to believe differently.

During this most blessed time of year, share yourself in time or charitable gifts for the benefit of others, many of whom are unemployed for the first time.  Send some handwritten notes to those who have added value to your life now or in times past and to our soldiers. Help a local food bank. Everyday there are missed opportunities to say thank you: someone at work, someone assisted you during a shopping trek, your hair dresser, at your nail salon, your church, and the list goes on and on.  Open your eyes, minds and hearts as windows into the life of another. 

This holiday season is celebrated in so many ways that it is no wonder to me that smiles alight most faces and the spirit of giving abounds.

Best wishes to all of you this Christmas season.

My personal take on “It’s a Wonderful Life”

Tonight I watched "It's a Wonderful Life" which is a wonderful reminder of the people in our lives that make our life worth living.   The movie causes much reflection plus George Bailey is a banker as was I for so many, many years.

Life is not about what you do not have or can no longer do but about what you do with God's gifts which come in many forms, many of which you may not realize as gifts.

As I said, in the movie George Bailey is a banker which is a reminder of my banking career.  It afforded me the opportunity to work “with” people in an industry that for many years was held in high regard. These people were customers, non-customers and co-workers.  The industry may have changed over the course of my 34 years in banking but my appreciation for “people” in various stages of one’s personal or professional career has not wavered.  The gifts for me during my 34 years in banking were the people and related conversations which must number in the 1000s.

Yes, I look at my career in banking as a gift but perhaps not in the way that comes to mind. The income that grew over time afforded wonderful vacations, a great wardrobe which includes 100+ pairs of shoes (most of which I am selling or donating to the non-profit Dress For Success) and a nice home.  Yes these are secular but don’t give up on me yet.  The gift part here is that my husband and I have no debt, in part because of my day job as a banker. 

God granted me the knowledge and wherewithal to become a banker, the tenacity to stay in an industry that survived the 1980s and to reach a point that leaving the industry was the best decision for me and opened an opportunity for someone with the goals and energy of my younger self. 

My family is also a gift, some through the nature of my birth and some through choice such as my husband which resulted in my being included in his huge clan, not a loser in the bunch. 

My freedom here in the USA which includes freedom of religion is a given.  Both have received time in previous blogs AND it still holds true, hence the mention.

Getting back to the movie calls to mind the inscription made by Clarence, the lovable, capable angel in the story in the book that he had, “Tom Sawyer”, which  reads “No man is a failure if he has friends.”  I must agree and must add family to the mix. It was after all the loving wife Mary who contacted the friends that come to the “financial” rescue of her husband, George the banker.

By the way, there are a lot of bad bankers like Old Man Potter in the story which is an understatement.  Just watch the news. However, there are still come good bankers around and I will gladly make that referral.  I also gladly share what I have learned over my working career as a Business Banker.  Just give me a call, send me an email, or post your question to my Facebook page.

I will stay tuned for you…………

IN FLANDERS FIELD BY JOHN MCCRAE

A surgeon and military officer serving for Canada was so moved and haunted by his experience that he handwrote this poem on a simple notepad during a period when he was expected “to rest”. He endured and his team accomplished more than thought humanly possible.  It was through his anguish of losing a friend who was also a former student and by needs presiding over the makeshift funeral/burial that these memorable words fell from his heart, through his fingers to a piece of paper that we have this poem that has been learned/memorized by students and citizens alike.  

To think that the view of poppies growing in ditches of Europe that had experienced so much bloodshed pricked his heart is such a way.

To think that he was so affected by 17 days of service that a poem was handwritten, disregarded and discarded, collected by someone equally touched as well as persistent enough to garner  an approval for publication even after being rejected by a newspaper before finally being presented to publishing media that “did have the intelligence” to recognize the significance of these written words.

How appropriate today that my special Canadian friend Dolores Morse posted this for all to enjoy which gives me the opportunity to share “the rest of the story” with each of you.  Here is that much loved poem.

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow

Between the crosses row on row,

That mark our place; and in the sky

The larks, still bravely singing, fly

Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,

Loved and were loved, and now we lie

In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:

To you from failing hands we throw

The torch; be yours to hold it high.

If ye break faith with us who die

We shall not sleep, though poppies grow

In Flanders fields.