Caring Continues With the Benefit of Memories

Oh my goodness, yet another four days shared with Mom and William. Each time I get to help creates more memories together for the three of us. At times I even get to be a telephone operator during my stay which affords talks with beloved uncles, cousins and the best of our friends.

 Meal times also create memories since much of my cooking plus recipes were learned from mom, her sister (Aunt Dude) and her mother (Grandma Buck). Even cleaning up the kitchen is tied to my mother.  She said that you cannot be considered a good cook unless you clean up the kitchen after each meal.  Thankfully we have dishwashers to shorten that task.  OF NOTE: When we were younger and someone asked mom if she had a dishwasher she said “Yes, I have three and there are portable (with a slight pause here). Their names are Linda, Rebecca and Julia.”  We talked about that too and we had a good laugh (one of many this weekend).

I really love being able to share these moments publicly. It serves as a reminder of the good times that are still possible to share with my mother until the dementia steals more and more of her away from me.  

The Joy of Caring for a One so Dear

What a wonderful four days and three nights I was able to share recently with my mom and dad.  It was a time of peace, calmness, laughter and a time of sharing plus reflection.  I was able to cook for them (no surprise there) and we had daily Bible study time together as well. What a joy these days have been to me which serves as a reminder of the mothers who gave us life and the relationship that each of us has built with her over time.

 We shared so many vacations together over the years which included the wonderful man that is now her husband (my dad) and his youngest son who is now my youngest brother.  When they married I gained another sister and two brothers so we are now a family of seven siblings.  I count each of them as blessings to my life and “our family” has grown with their respective spouses, children, grandchildren and some great-grandchildren along the way for our parents. 

 My sisters Rebecca, Laura and I willingly alternate the day and night care of mom and assist William however needed being sensitive to the time and scheduled commitments each of us may have, some of which cannot be changed on a moment’s notice but given a day or twos notice can be accomplished.   Plans are subject to change and can be worked out calmly, with personalities and jealousies set aside.

 What will not be broken or manipulated is the bond shared with our mother and William.  Every minute and moment shared with my mother and William this week is committed to my memory and the maneuvering of others cannot take that away. 

I look forward to any hours, days or nights that will be shared in their home or elsewhere.  Home health care and physical therapy is in the works which is great and my mother is looking forward to walking again and a more independent lifestyle.  Until then her independent spirit lives on in each of the siblings and we will each continue with whatever care is needed for both our mom and our dad, William.